I haven’t blogged here in quite a long time. In fact, for the last few months this URL has pointed to my work website. But the year is winding down, which means it’s time for me to get overly sentimental and reflect on everything that’s happened in the last 360-odd days.
2016 was a weird year. I mean, if you look at it globally, the year was a shitshow. Cops killing black men, black men killing cops. Losing iconic celebrities. Terrorist attacks throughout Europe. And we somehow elected a pig in a person suit to the Presidency. It’s just been a fucking mess.
Personally, though, it hasn’t been a horrible year. There was a lot of give and take this year – for every good thing that happened, there seemed to be a bad one right around the corner, but for once I didn’t let it dampen my spirit. I’ve come out of it relatively at peace with everything.
I got a puppy, my driver’s license (ending my, ahem, criminal activities…), a tattoo, and a new car. Not a bad haul for the year.
I also feel like, this year especially, I’ve grown as a person more than I have in years. Last year was the year of not giving a fuck. That trend definitely continued into 2016 – in fact, I think I took it too far. However, in the words of the almighty Kylie, 2016 was definitely the year of “realizing things”.
There was this semi-conscious shift in my thoughts, actions, and feelings. Ironically, though I tried my damndest to not give a fuck, this year I realized that sometimes, it’s okay, and even important to care. I realized that I was wrong about a lot of my positions, philosophically.
So many of my thoughts and positions were based on the assumption that everyone was level-headed, logical, and realized that going out of their way to hurt someone because they were different is just fucking crazy. And so my reaction to the opposing side – the emotional, sweeping generalizations and bad mouthing just seemed childish and wrong. How could I support people making a fuss over nothing?
2016 burst my bubble in a big way.
I became aware that I lead a very privileged life. I also became aware that just because I’m logical and level-headed, it doesn’t mean everyone else is. It really hit me that there are people out there who would look at me, see that I’m a woman, and think I’m less worthy of respect than they are. There are people out there that want to hurt my sibling because they’re transgender. I realized that these people either choose to act this way, or are sincere in their sentiments.
I realized that many of the injustices, the absolute abhorrent racism and sexism and bigotry that enrage people do actually happen. Just because I’ve never experienced it, or seen it with my own eyes, doesn’t mean it isn’t real.
I’ve spent the last six months of 2016 in a bit of an identity crisis. Who I am now, how I feel about the world now, isn’t how I did at the beginning of the year. I’ve finally come to understand that, perhaps, it’s a good thing.
I’ve grown so much as a person this year. And I’ve realized so. damn. much.
So what’s in store for 2017?
I started my New Year’s Resolutions early this year. I divided them up into two sections: work and life. I wrote them down in my bullet journal. I’ve started researching the tools I need to accomplish them. Some of them are a bit out there, but I think if I put my mind to them, I’ll get farther than I thought.
- 24 hour response time
- do 5 small projects
- make $20,000
- take weekends off
- invest in learning & training. max $1,000
- find a va
- find a business coach
- start a podcast
- start making themes again
- lose weight. goal weight: 220lbs
- read more. goal: 12 novels
- relax. goal: 5 minutes of meditation daily
- drink more water. goal: 8 glasses a day
- have more sex. 😏
- wake up earlier. goal: 7:00 AM
- personal blog (this one!) 1 time a week
- start the home-buying process
In addition to those, I also plan on getting married in 2017, meaning a big rebrand for work as well. If I knock out all of these things next year, I’m pretty sure I’ll become unstoppable. But I think the biggest goal of the year is to continue down the path I’ve started – learning, growing and becoming a better person.
What’s one thing you’ve “realized” in 2016? What are your New Year’s Resolutions? Leave a comment & let me know!